A Woman's Betrayer

Emotions. A woman's greatest betrayer is her own emotions. With no control, she drowns in her ocean of various emotions. Although right now, there is one type of emotion that brings so much damage to herself, and to the people around her.

Jealousy.

Jealousy is insane when its towards someone because of a certain special someone. It is deadly, it is lonely, it is empty. It's a sad emotion to keep. I don't understand why there are a lot of women who hides this emotion. I tried to hide it, but it actually made things worse! And i've seen how unfair it is to the person concerned.

Jealousy isn't something worth keeping, worth hiding. It is something that has to be brought out of the light, something that HAS to be talked about. When jealousy is present in the heart, every person around you is a threat. You lose sight of the goodness of your friendship with other people and you see competitiveness instead. It's lonely because you can't see any good in the people around you anymore. You destroy trust and faith inside of you. It's not a happy place to be in.

Choosing your emotions over your relationships is very stupid and crappy. It's selfish, and girl, i tell you, it's self condemnation and it's a place that you can easily get away from, don't let yourself drown on those worthless and nonsense self-pity or self-condemnation thoughts, cause you know? You're beautiful and jealousy is taking that away from you.

In this life, jealousy is sure to knock at your heart's door. There is so much to be jealous about. Circumstances, material things, money, beauty, achievements, and a lot of other things, but most especially, relationships. Don't let jealousy destroy a beautiful relationship, let it be your friends, best friends, boyfriends, or spouses.

Having someone special in your life is the most beautiful thing God has ever created. It is the breath of God patching both of you together in His warm embrace. It is an expression of His great love for you. Don't let jealousy blind you. Rather let it help you communicate your emotions to your special someone. Let them know who you are. Don't be ashamed to show how much of a human you really just are. If they get mad at you, at least you were real. Don't hide who you are. You're a woman, you feel this emotion.

Jealousy isn't something worth keeping. It deceives you to be strong and powerful; it's pride. Don't let those things steal you of your relationship.

Pride can never, EVER, level up to the beauty of the feeling of having someone special in your life. Step on that pride, and communicate why you're jealous. Do it now, before those crappy thoughts eat you alive. Before you lose your special someone, and before you lose every relationship connected to it. Think about it, it's rather destroying your innocence in loving someone. Don't let that happen cause you hurt God as well.

Reaching Dreams

When I was a kid, I always looked forward to reaching my dreams.
I studied hard, did everything to make my art look good and worked hard for confidence.
Now that I am in my senior year, graduating this school year in college. . .
Things did not turn out the way I imagined it to be.

Don't get me wrong, I was honestly expecting the hardships the challenges.
I imagined the discrimination, the doubts, the financial challenges, and the criticisms.
But there is one thing that I have never thought about. .
Something I never expected to actually pull me down big time and actually discourage me.

Me.

The biggest challenge i have right now, is the battle within myself.
My self-pity, my fears, my indecisiveness, my own expectations.
My own doubts with my own craft, My own pessimism towards my art.
My own criticism with my own art, my own condemnation.

My being perfectionist.

This is one of the most challenging factors to face when one reaches her dream.
Being a perfectionist is something that has to be controlled and balanced.
It's somewhat unhealthy when you focus so much on making all things good,
And actually forgetting that you make art to be happy, not to make money.

I guess thats the point, reaching one's dream and providing for her own needs,
Is the biggest battle any artist could face into reaching her dreams.
It's no joke to graduate and risk reaching one's dream over a sure steady job.
It is a battle between having money with no dream against having a dream with no money.

But then again, you'll never know what can happen.
Quite frankly, all you need is God's Hands over your dreams,
And accepting His Grace and trusting Him that He provides for all your needs.
So you get your dreams and the provision that you actually need.

The secret to reaching one's dreams is actually keeping one's eyes on Him. :)

God's Best

A conversation between two different people who loves God. I hope this inspires you as much as it has inspired me. :)

________

I honestly like you a lot, and maybe something more than that.
I'm very scared to lose you & very scared to know the truth about us.
What if God really doesn't mean for us to be together?
How exactly can I react to that?
Do I let you go or do I rebel and stay with you?
But someday hear from someone that I should have waited for God's best.
Cause if we're not meant for each other, we at some percentage destroy something inside of us.
Before I always would let go of anything for God. . .
But somehow when it came to the matters of the heart, I am somehow divided.
I am so scared to lose you, but I am more scared to disappoint God.
I love God so much, but I'm extremely scared to lose you.
Somehow I wonder if this happens to other people.
I am so much concerned of what God wants, that I don't want to make a mistake.

________

That's why we're lessening everything at the moment.
Because we still don't know if we're meant for each other.
That's why we're lessening, to detach ourselves from each other.
So that if ever one day, we find out that God doesn't want us to be together, then we can take it.
We have to be strong for us to go through that.
There might be someone else there that God wants for you.
I want to be with you, but if God doesn't want me to, no matter how hurtful it truly is for me, I will have to let go.
Even if you don't want to let go, I will.
No matter how much I really don't want to.
But as long as I know it's for the best of us, especially you, then we'll be fine.
We just have to be strong.
But i do pray, every single day that we'll be together.
And i know that He's listening to me.
I know that He hears the cries of my heart. What I REALLY want and that I'd do practically anything to be with her.
He listens to me, and that's what eases my doubts of the future.
That I've done everything I can to be with you, and even with that, we still won't be together, then it really isn't meant to be.
I know that if ever we're together, and its not supposed to be, we will never be happy, We will always have our conscience talking to us.
So no matter which way it goes, God will always be with us.

________

We will follow God no matter what.
He knows what's best for us.
I cannot comprehend the idea of not being with you & spending my life with another guy.
But i do understand & believe that He's not doing this because He's controlling us. .
Rather because He knows what's best for us.
I want to be with you, but if there's another girl who's far more better than I am that will suit you better, then I will let go.
Not because of rebellion against God, but rather because of my utmost care about you.
Only God knows if we'll be together, but at this moment, you are the best for me.
Now I understand what it truly means, "If you really love somebody, you let them go,"
It's not a heroic act, but rather an act of wisdom and complete understanding of what "love" really means.
I'll be honest, up until now, I am searching for the real meaning of those three little words.
Whatever happens between us, we leave it all to God.

________